Kurtz's Darkned Heart

“One evening coming in with a candle
I was startled to hear him say a little tremulously,
‘I am lying here in the dark waiting for death.’
The light was within a foot of his eyes.
I forced myself to murmur, ‘Oh, nonsense!’
and stood over him as if transfixed.
“One evening I came into the cabin with a
candle and heard him say,
‘I am lying here in the dark waiting for death.’
I forced myself to say,
‘Nonsense.’ I stood over him as if in a trance.
“Anything approaching the change that came over his features
I have never seen before, and hope never to see again.
Oh, I wasn’t touched.
I was fascinated. It was as though a veil had been rent.
I saw on that ivory face the expression of sombre pride,
of ruthless power, of craven terror
—of an intense and hopeless despair.
Did he live his life again in every detail of desire,
temptation, and surrender during that supreme
moment of complete knowledge? He cried in a whisper
at some image, at some vision—he cried out twice,
a cry that was no more than a breath:
“I was fascinated by the horrible look his face.
It was as though a veil had been torn.
I saw beneath his ivory skin a mix of pride,
power, ruthlessness, terror, and despair.
Was he realizing all of the horrible desires
he had satisfied during his life? Some sort
of vision passed before his eyes and he whispered a cry:
The horror! The horror!